it’s baaa-aack
May 9, 2008 by potandbox
yesterday, i came across my nemesis, toxicodendron radicans.
(cue evil villainous music: bah-buh-bum)
there i was, happily gardening–achieving a balance of efficiency and peacefulness, when i saw it–noooooooo, i groaned. all work stopped.
step one: survey the compost so far–
had i touched it? was i condemned to a summer of oozing, itchy spots?
step two: wonder if i can work around it–
but how? it could be anywhere, everywhere. and the slightest touch,
even that of a bug nibble can release the urushiol found in every part of the plant.
step three: acceptance–
realizing my hourly rate may cover the steroids for treatment,
but will not ease the suffering caused by endless itching
and my eventual outcasting from society for being “the one with poison ivy.”
maybe i can place an help wanted ad on craigslist:
seeking non-affected poison ivy eradicator for dangerous, lonely work.

Oohhh Nooooo…. I hope you aren’t itchy today!
i had some phantom itches, but it was only p.i. paranoia…but remember when i was in your wedding covered in actual poison ivy spots? great timing!
i hope all is sunny and tropical in florida.